Anticipate with secure optimism!

I know for myself that if I can chill and relax around people I'm comfortable with I'm easier to get to know,not the life of the party,just more responsive to others.If I'm near a guy I'm attracted to...I can't say a damn word and more than likely bite his head off if he approached me.I get tense and edgy and that doesn't go over too well with the opposite sex as in attractiveness,unless they are clueless or like that sort of thing.For me it's definitely nerves and uncertainty,put me on safe ground and I just mellow out.It saddens me because I don't mean to be rude or appear hostile,and I don't want to be,but when I feel uncertain or in a 'threatening' situation it just goes on automatic.For me to try and flirt and be approachable...I feel fake unless I genuinely feel it and it takes awhile for me to get to that point to where I'm comfortable with others.So Radical Dreamer,your'e not the only one who goes through this with the opposite sex.And I can relate to attracting people I don't want,not all the time,but on occasion it was like what in the world do I have to do to lose this guy? Hit him with a two by four?And the more cool and distant I became the more the guy would hang on...it would almost be funny except I wasn't laughing at the time.